Starting my new goals......

• Posted by Elisa on June 28, 2008 at 9:52am

Ok, being that Kathleen's most recent post sparked my mind going on affirmations I figured I would post them here along with my new goals.

I WILL chose to use positive and affirming speech when I speak of myself and the things I do. If I want to change them I will speak as though I am already doing the changed behaviour and making the choices I want to be making.
I DO eat supportively and feed my body and muscles the nutrients they need to grow and thrive.
I DO feed my body about every 3 hours, 5 times a day to maintain my metabolism.
I DO love the challenge of working out, exercise and being active.
I DO work out consistently.
I LOVE getting out of my chair and dancing, playing with my boys and enjoying activities outdoors.
I DO buy and keep supportive food and choices in my fridge and pantry.
I WILL make supportive foods as convienent, go-to foods in my house.
I WILL continue to reduce the fat on my body and get a lean, toned body.
I DO drink lots of water to encourage my body to feel and look good.
I AM continually planning for the foods and meals I will eat during the week.
I DO listen and follow the POSITIVE thinking that is in my OWN head.
I AM a positive thinker and person.

My goal is: Continued Fit Yummy Mummy-ness. I also want to increase my strength and meet the challenge of doing pull ups in August (with my fit little sister). (And add in a BIG goal of modeling with my boys included.......Dax 100 style, baby.....big goals!)

My reason for this goal: I want to tighten up my lose skin and continue to get toned. I also love being strong and if I am going to have muscles, they better be doing the work too. I have also noticed it is easier to do housework, clean, carry grocery baskets, and catch and protect my kids and I want to improve on this standard of living. (as for the modeling, I think it would be fun and I would love to try it out)

Steps I will take: Workout consistenly with added strength component (do chin ups, negative pull ups, etc). Get heavier weights. I already put in my request with the hubby hehe. Eat more supportively on a consistent basis by stepping up the level I currently plan meals with. Pick out recipes at the beginning of the week for dinner and cook up a little extra so it is ready to go for lunches during the week. Look into more breakfast ideas that work for me and the boys that add variety and provide a good, balanced start to the day. Also, keep a conscious eye on when and what I am putting into my mouth at meal times to make sure I am getting the variety I need for a balanced diet. (As for modeling, continue to find an agency to represent that is not charging fees, etc before we begin. My friends who models say they put NO money into it and everything was paid for by the company).

Potential obstacles: Lack of sleep, increased stress, over exposure to toxins and allergens that cause downtime, lack of focus.

Solutions to obstacles: Enforce bedtime to be no later than 9:30pm and if it does run over, make sure to get a nap the following day. Meditate and keep a positive perspective in times of stress. Also maintaining supportive nutrition and exercise will help to keep me happy. Avoid situations of high fragrance and get out of our condo as often as possible. Continue to get a fresh air flow throughout and keep moving. Stay aware of my eating choices and set my priorities each day so I get done what needs to get done.

Who will help me: My FYM friends, my boys, my sister, my mom, my hubby and friends. Full support enrollment. I will involve all in my plans as we eat and are active together on a constant basis.

When I'll start: Today. Nutrition is an easy start point and I can start as soon as my next meal. My next workout I will try out the negative pull up and a few chin ups.

When I'll meet my goal: I want to meet the challenge of doing a pull up by end of August.

How I'll reward myself for making progress toward my goal: SMILE! And enjoy the moment of acknowledgement. And maybe some shopping hehehe.

Tags: challenge, goals

Date night

• Posted by Elisa on June 28, 2008 at 8:29am

Well, I wore the dress and shoes. It was a fun outfit and a good evening. I went out to get some blood work done that afternoon and stopped to see a friend for lunch. I get to alter her wedding dress......fun! When me and the boys got home, we had a little bit of time to have dinner and be out the door to Nana and Papa's place. We had chicken and asparagus for dinner as it was the quickest thing I could prep and still give myself time to get ready. My sister came and picked them up instead, but we still wanted to get in to see an early show. We saw "Forbidden Kingdom" with Jackie Chan and Jet Li (hehe fun movie) and then went for ice cream at Baskin Robbins. I got a scoop of almond chocolate fudge and it was perfect. I tried a couple other flavours, but I was done with them after the little taste......way too sweet. Very simple date....it was cool.

You just gotta love where you are at as you look to the future

• Posted by Elisa on June 25, 2008 at 2:00pm

This was inspired by another post, but is also for me to document where I have come from and how happy I was at any size. Each time I look back on these pictures I see that I truly enjoyed where I was at, but still wanted to get back to a healthy weight for me and my kids. I must say, when I was a larger size, I really enjoyed my bosom and booty. It was so different for me to have curves and I worked with it. It was fun! Now of course, I had my moments of displeasure, but on the most part I was just glad to be alive.

This was me 2 years ago to the date. I was at 200lbs and still not quite able to work out due to continued tearing that I was experiencing. I was still nursing as well. Not my most favorite picture(the first one), but just wait, there is more.

This is me a month later. Same size/weight, but I was happy. I started shopping more for my size and buying clothes to compliment my current figure and forecast into the future for the size I would be.

But my LEAST favorite picture was from last year this time. A friend was visiting from the other side of the country and it was after I made the commitment to lose the weight now that I was able. I had lost 14 lbs and was at 186lbs, but my skin and clothes were loose and the picture she took of me convinced me that she would NEVER get another shot like that in again. Even better yet, she posted it on facebook and tagged it. So it's out there for all to see hehehe.

I have had pictures where I get caught with my mouth full of food, in the middle of talking and looking like a donkey, but this picture was so strange to me (the perspective is skewed and my friend to the right is around 5'9 - 10" and she looks shorter than me) based on how big I looked. So I change my hair, never really wore that top again hehehe and of course, got down to business with my nutrition, portion size, and workouts.
So this Friday is date night and I will be posting the red shoes with the black dress picture and in a month I will post (with Rachel and others) swim suit pics and in that time my friend will be visiting again and I will get an updated friend photo as well. So here is to capturing the moment. SMILE!

Tags: confident, content, happy, motivated, pictures

Happy 5th birthday BBQ!

• Posted by Elisa on June 23, 2008 at 10:00am

Each year we have had a BBQ in celebration of our oldest sons birthday! The first year we had it, it was sunny and then rained, and each year after was the threat of rain and conflicting events that have hung over the prep of the occasion. This year I decided to go low key. With so many events planned for the weekend I didn't want to throw in the fuss of conflict again. But last Sunday I was inspired to do the BBQ again. The forecast was for sunny skies and so I sent out a few invites to family and friends to come out and join us at the park. Usually we have had the BBQ at our house, but being that they are bigger kids now, I wanted them to have the space to run around. The theme "fun in the sun". I had planned out what we would eat: Veggies, salad, Greek salad, strawberries, grapes, watermelon, hummus, tortilla chips (organic spicy multigrain), salsa, beef burgers, whole wheat kaiser buns, and grilled chicken. All simple, portable, and long stand out time too. I planned that Saturday would be the day that we run around and gather the food and stuff and I packed all the party stuff and utensils during the week to avoid last minute rush.
Then the fun began..........negativity set in during the week and it rippled through all of us. It was a FIGHT all week and in the midst of damage control, reinforcing my children's ability to do things and being drained of energy and concerned for my own health, the weather forecast for Sunday continued to change from Sunday to Thunderstorm. By Thursday I decided that regardless of the weather, we were going to stick with the initial location and theme LOL. My husband was not involved this time around in the planning and it made it quite hard, and being supportive to him through the continued self-sabotage, negativity, inappropriate comments, and depression. And having had no sleep (5 hours the whole weekend), I was struggling to get done what needed to get done for the party let alone for the daily basics. My friend wanted to spend time together on Saturday and decided she would help me to get the groceries and that would be our time together. It was great fun and I got all that I could remember to get.

In comes Sunday morning. I wake up to the sun and by 5am it starts to get dark and rain. I was also informed that we would have to leave the house an hour earlier to pick up someone on the way to church. At that point, as overwhelming as it was, I proceeded with tunnel vision to get things done. So I ran a bath for my oldest (bathed the baby the night before to save time) and went back to preparing the food. I got the boys breakfast, my oldest headed upstairs and I continued prepping the food. It wouldn't take long and I had it mapped out in my head as what to do. Then my hubby wakes up. He sees that it's raining and then the negativity dropped in like a fog and so did all the questions. By the way, as much as I am a person that gets a lot of stuff done, I am in no ways a Multi-tasker. I put my mind and body into one thing at a time, so that I am fully aware of what I am doing and where I am at. My hubby refuses to accept this fact. "Look at the weather! How are we going to do this.......do that.......how are we cooking the food? Did you buy wood? Did you buy this? Did you buy that? We should call and tell people to come here instead.....etc, etc, etc." At that point I felt burdened by all the questions and was fighting to remain positive as my growing frustration would not help to get things done (anger management is my constant battle). I know that because he chose to be depressed and negative all week, he was not in a mindset to be helpful. So then he asked how he could help. At this point, I did not have the mental separation from my task to answer his questions. I just kept thinking this is for son and it will be encouraging for him and those that come regardless of what I missed. So I prayed to God. I needed his help. Afterwards, I would delegate tasks and he would come back "what else?"........I don't work that way. Not yet (not sure if I would want to). If I see a need, I meet it. The boys were upstairs in the bath.....wait, the BOYS?!? OH NO! SO while I was annoyed by this fact that I was distracted from keeping an eye on my youngest, I ran up and got them out.......got the baby out and lotioned and dressed and then on to my oldest. While I was getting them out, my hubby came up to ask more questions. ARRRGGGGHHH!!! I just went tighter into my tunnel and got the task done. FOCUS!!!! I have already lost an hour to what I had planned and I just wanted to get out. I was struggling against just throwing everything down ad running out of the house into the rain screaming. I have had enough. With all the questions and negative comments I was just freaking out on the inside and then I decided to look into the eyes of my son and stay there. It was a safe, encouraging place to be and I gave him my full attention. I combed through his curls and I moisturized his hair and skin and together, we picked out an outfit for him to wear. It was 15 minutes of peace. SO after getting my boys ready, the food prepped, stuff packed up, I was left out of the equation. Makes me mad and sad at the same time. I chugged down a protein shake and then threw on what was sitting out in front of me. I made sure that I had my make up on as we were heading to church and it was the least I could do for my God. And I came down and they were already out sitting in the car. Stuff was still in the house and not all of it was packed into the car yet. I didn't get to do my usual walk through the house before we left or to check if the boys had on the right coats, but OH WELL! I was literally DONE at this point! Grabbed what I could and got out of the house.
We went to pick up our friend and went to church. I had fun in the babies class and then when service was done, I made sure to encourage my friends and then we were out the door. Back in the car and on the discussion of cooking the food. Get fire wood. Simple right? LOL, not to the mind of those in depression. AND I THANK GOD that I lived this way for a large bulk of my life so that I can have compassion instead of full-blown rage in situations like these. No argument. I let him come up with his own solution. Everything I have suggested (over the whole week) has not only been refused, but turned away from. So whatever he came up with was fine. He bought a portable grill and then we went to set up at the park.
So we get to the park........a function is going on HAHAHAH. Didn't see it on the website, but OH WELL! The spot I had picked out would be available regardless......it was by the playground. But as we were driving through to get to the spot, here we go with more negativity! UGH! LOL, ...."There is no parking....Where are we going to set up?.......we have to walk through the rain with the stuff.....". I could tell at that point that because I have not consulted with Mother Nature on the weather, I did not have a barbeque strapped to my back, I did not have a police escort to the picnic site with a rainbow following us, that I was the worst party planner EVER! Well, when we got close to the site, there was plenty of parking available, the distance to walk was not far at all and we had full access to the covered area and picnic tables (with adjoining public washrooms). It was AWESOME! Some of our friends were already there and we quickly set up and were under way.

SO, how did it go? GREAT! Everyone loved the food! We were able to cook the burgers (and later the chicken) with ease. The kids had fun running around and even playing in the rain, and we were encouraged by our family and friends.

What did I learn?
Stick to it! Make the plan and be encouraged to continue regardless of the obstacles. Be positive! I thrive on positivity and I tend to attack negativity. I broke that tendency this time around and chose to encourage as best I could. As much as we should surround ourselves with positive people, some people we need to help to be more positive and sometimes they just chose to stay negative. In cases like that, enlist help. Through our friends at church, we have enlisted a "turn to" couple that helps us to stay on track iin line with the life that we have chosen, to be disciples of Jesus, children of God. This couple was at the BBQ and I couldn't have asked for a better gift and greater encouragement. Also, the wife had helped me to do the shopping the day before. PERSPECTIVE and FOCUS! WOW, how important it is to always look for the best out of every situation, live IN the moment, and focus on your goals. And last (again), but not least, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF! You are the BEST person to take care of YOU! YOU know what you need and it is best to make sure your needs are met so that you can go after the needs of others. Encouraging others and meeting the needs of others is hugely important as well as it helps to encourage us and to keep perspective on the things around us, but we should remember to meet our needs as well.

Ok, this week is going to be GREAT! So many great things learned and reinforced that I will live out these lessons fully. Have a great week!

Tags: celebrate, challenges, depression, family, joy, persevere, perspective, positive

ANNNNDDDD.......We're IN!

• Posted by Elisa on June 21, 2008 at 4:30pm

Well, I set my new goals over a month ago. I bought the jeans to get into (LOL and the corresponding wardrobe to fit.....ALL on sale of course) and I also was blessed with the opportunity to buy TT at a price that didn't bust my budget. First thing I did, Bikini Ready Abs. SO for the last 5 weeks (I was sick for one week) I put into it. It was awesome. Loved the change in pace, loved the workouts and loved the changes I was seeing. And although I was able to do up the jeans after 3 weeks, I still had the muffin heheh. Now, I am going to do something I haven't done before.

Now I still have a bit muffin, but considering these are now my only pair of jeans that "fit", I am satisfied with wear they are at. I enjoy the fact that my body has transformed tremendously and just in time for my family's next gathering, my son's birthday BBQ. It will be a joy being out in the park in my new body and in front of the camera with my family and friends. As I have looked back over the photos I did take at my sons' parties, I was barely in them. I am going to start taking pictures WITH my sons as Holly has with Tyler. I just love the photos she has shared and was sad to realize I didn't have much of my own.

So here is to new beginnings, summer time, spending quality and healthy time with family and friends, and being a living example of commitment, discipline and healthy choices. To Love and to life.

Elisa

Heart break........Ignorance is not bliss

• Posted by Elisa on June 15, 2008 at 7:30am

Packing is a great way to get final with a situation. Not just putting stuff in a box and setting it aside, but looking at items and knowing that you will see them again in a new location.

We had family drop by yesterday evening. My hubby's Aunt and Uncle who are truck drivers and they were passing through town and my dad (hahah just in time for Father's day encouragement). Our first visitors came bearing treasures from a recent purge of my DHs grandmother's things. She has Alzheimer's and is in a home now. I know these items are dear to his family and have some memories as well and I think it is sweet that they thought to give them to us, but MAN, where am I going to put this stuff. I need a spot to put all the gifts from our families that are intended to just SIT there LOL. BUT we will get to that when we unpack them into a new place. My dad brought up the fact that he hates moving after our other visitors left and my hubby replied that he is surprised we haven't moved on in a while. That confirmed it for me. Start packing. It's an opportunity to get rid of what you don't need and I am going to jump on it this time.

As I wake with a migraine again (it is now daily for me and my hubby) and knowing I have done everything I can to resolve the matter of mold toxins that have been plaguing the health of me and my family, the power to resolve the issue rest in one phone call and not from me. You see, yesterday my heart was broken. And as I type it may come out to the reason why. I have been going after getting a mold issue to be fixed in our condo and not just for myself, but for the benefit of the health of my neighbours as well. It is just ONE LITTLE FIX. Costing no more than $50 and taking no longer than a day to complete. THAT'S IT! This one little fix however may cost a few families their health (and I am not sticking around to possibly not wake up one morning) and already $1000 dollars worth of attention, and in the end, it is NOT getting fixed. I think I felt so sad yesterday because one person felt that they could not make change and stand up for themselves and all they have to do is go that one last step. A phone call. She quit. She stopped with her toes on the edge on the finish line and chose not to bring her other foot forward to win the race. Not only that, but has turned around running in the opposite direction. I'm still overwhelmed by the choice.

The only comparison I have is from the movie, "The Matrix". When the guy betrays his crew to try and return to the matrix as he no longer wanted to live as he was. He wanted to return to ignorance and enjoy the "bliss" of not knowing. Once you know the truth and have fought for it, you can not return to not knowing it. For me, it is easier to fight for life then to risk death. That is my constant motivation (and I think sometimes I wish it wasn't, but that is the truth I have to live by). I can't return to the matrix and be "plugged" back into ignorance. And watching a family get seriously ill, knowing that they know how to have it fixed and that they choose not to hurts me. I can understand that she is not willing to pay the price of "discomfort" or having to move (although they have to move soon anyways), but I know that my choice would be to guard the health of my child at all costs (her daughter is getting really ill from this). Again, my request is prayer as I focus on how we are going to sell this place, and what we will be moving into. Also, that many of you have chosen to discover the truth in regards to your health and being truly "fit" in all areas of your lives. It is easier to keep moving forward, than to quit. It is better and easier to be healthy than to not be healthy. And don't stop if you think it's too hard.....although the future is unknown, it can be wonderful. We all go to sleep expecting to wake up the next day and moving forward for the better is no different. We don't know what each day holds, but it's ALWAYS an opportunity to do better than what we have done before. Quitting, stopping or running in the opposite direction of where you want to go won't help you to wake up the next day. Life continues regardless. Make each day worth living. It's too wonderful to not appreciate to its fullest.

Have a great and blessed day!

Tags: fight, forward, health, keep, life, moving, quit

Shop? YEAH!! for a bikini? Hmmmm......

• Posted by Elisa on June 13, 2008 at 7:43am
  

I love to shop! HAHAH, let me say it again as I love it so much! I LOVE to shop! It's not my "vice", but I know I do it well, efficient, and affordable. I started shopping frugal at a young age. My mom cut me off at around ten for buying new clothes, because I complained about a shirt she bought me. (LOL I can still see it in my head....blue, white and black.....newsprint graphics all over ....very busy, very pop (it was the 80s), and not me...) Instead I settled with the hand-me-downs from my parents closet (yep, I wore 70s clothing........tight-rolled those bell bottoms and let them out in high school), and took up the family craft of making my own clothing. My dad taught me the essentials; sewing, cooking, cleaning, making my bed (never mastered that one) and all the things I would need as a wife (so he thought). But he also shared with me his love for being an interior decorator and his mother's love for fabric, sewing, and crafting your own items. I became known as quite the designer and I was proud to sport my own style and own clothing and know that not only was it something no one had or was wearing, but it was what I wanted to wear. I was a trend setter.

So fast forward to the shopping. University! I traveled a lot when I was not taking classes and I was on the go all the time. I had no time to sew, no time for laundry, as most of my time was spent on campus or away from home. I was out in the club life and I was involved in promotions....I had to look stylish and current. I was also working 2 or 3 jobs and in all that, still had very little money to speak of. So I learned to do a 30 second scan of stores to see if I could find stuff within my price range and was what I was looking for. I would refuse to buy things that I could make myself for cheaper. First scan, color. Second, scan, sale sign. And when I found something, I would check the price before size. Size can always be adjusted or worked with if too big or depending on the style, didn't matter anyways. Sometimes when I would have to travel at a moments notice, I would pack a few essentials and get clothes when I got there. I worked as a fashion consultant (nothing fancy, it was a retail store) and on the side, helped others shop for wardrobe essentials. It was fun sometimes, but I had to warn people in advance that it would be a quicker pace than what they were used to. If the store didn't met the need there was no time to dwell. Your mind just goes places that is not helpful when shopping.

But out of all that shopping I have only ventured down the swimsuit search a few times in my whole life. We were in swimming lessons with my mom when we were younger (suit one). Went to Jamaica in '87 and I had to have a new suit for the trip (suit 2). I joined my high school swim team ('90) and needed a team suit (suit 3). I attempted the idea of making one in high school from this cute fabric (white background, little bananas, and palm trees all over)....never finished. Went suit shopping with one of my friends who looked fab in everything.....didn't buy anything. Yeah, that's it. I had suit 3 until 2001. Brought it to Jamaica and discovered the elastic went funky in one of the bosom areas.....not a pretty sight.

I love to swim by the way, but while on the swim team I discovered I am hyper sensitive to chlorine. After a month of being on the team and in and out of the pool 5 days a week, morning and evening, I couldn't sweat through my pores. My skin would be on fire. So I have been limited in my exposure to swimming as I live in the prairies and I haven't gone out to the lakes. And as an added feature, being a woman who has dry and delicate hair, it was strange enough to have a "black" girl on the swim team in those days too. It was just not done. It's bad enough to have hair that tends to be dry all the time, but that kind of exposure was deemed as harsh in combination with relaxer chemicals and the works.

SO now, summer is upon us, I am not pregnant (or plan to be), and traveling to Ontario in less than 2 months. So I will need a suit. I mean I strut around the house in my sport top and undies most of the time, but now after seeing before and after pics, and fitness models in bikinis with their happy faces I can't help to think that there may be something to it.

Samantha (who I think has a deep love of bikinis....why not? Look at her in one!) has been my inspiration to look at the thought of myself in a bikini. Why? Because she looks the most comfortable in a bikini. It makes me think she wears them under her clothes or something heheh. I have managed two-piece combos, but looking back on the pictures, it looks juvenile and not very WOMANLY. I look like a size 14 girl.

I do have a pretty boyish shape, and now being back to that shape has been a bit of a challenge. But I like a good challenge and if looking like a woman in a swimsuit and maybe even a bikini is my goal then I am going to DO my best .

So thank you Samantha for reaching your goals and looking comfortable and great in a bikini and I will see what I find to bring out the best of what I've got.

Tags: bikini, fit, shop, swim

Feeling out of it

• Posted by Elisa on June 7, 2008 at 10:20am

I've been under the weather for most of the week it seems (although only since Tuesday) and these few days reinforced the fact that I much prefer to be healthy, alert, and feeling great. Who wouldn't if they truly knew what it feels like. I have had very little appetite, less energy, and feeling unmotivated in some areas of my life. I did manage to direct the energy I did have into other activities such as doing laundry and cleaning my house (Thanks to listening to Jan and Holly's call LOL.......nothing like someone telling you it is really simple to get you motivated hehehe. )
This morning I had a meditation session and towards the end I felt this swirling feeling. Like I was the water-going-down-a-drain kind of feeling. It was quite intense, and when I finished, my boys started to wake up. I just felt such a connection this morning and realized that my week, although I was sick, was encouraging for those around me as I took a step back from "gettin' it done" and chilled and talked and spent time with others. Definitely almost the opposite of the week I had prior. It was different that's for sure.
Yesterday I went shopping with a friend of mine from University. I haven't seen her in 2 years and she is now pregnant (very exciting). Now that I think of it, she was single the last time I saw her as well.....She is an advocate for change and growth and it was an encouraging time together. Also I bought a pair of wide legged khakis (best way to describe them) and they were a size 6. I didn't even try them on. At $5 I was just going to buy them and try them at home (plus my friend bought the boys balls and they were all over the place with them LOL). When I got home, I tried on the pants and they just slid on LOL. I was so excited. I know that my skinny jeans fit me now (and I mean traditional fit size 8, gap from over 10 years ago, no stretch skinny jeans), but it was nice to put on something with a touch of stretch and they feel so comfy. Perfect for the summer.
My goal for this coming week is to crank it (aunt flo is visiting,.....gotta keep it intense LOL), and to eat more veggies than I did this week. Also, I want to continue working on organizing the basement and clearing more stuff out. I managed to reclaim the office space (which is a part of our living room) so now time to file or shred and get the tools sorted and organized so we can use the 15 tape measures and 10 hammers we have when we need them LOL.
Anyways, gonna give working out a go today as I really feel the need to.

Have a great day and weekend!

Tags: change, encourage, out, routine, sick, working

Reflection of my week......"Just fine"

• Posted by Elisa on June 1, 2008 at 10:30am

As I woke with a smile on my face and the comfortable roll out of my bed this morning, looking forward to my workout and the day ahead of me, I can't help but to think back to the week I had.

I walked past the mirror in the dark this morning on my way to getting my big mug of water and I decided that I would check myself out. I noticed my skin was a lot looser over the last few days, but haven't really checked myself out naked for a while....it wasn't the usual "enjoying" of my body and how it's changing as I usually do, but more of a quick check. My mind has shifted into a different mode lately. Fighter mode. And at this time it is necessary. I have been struggling AGAINST severe exposure to perfume, cigarette smoke, and mold toxins and it has been mood-altering. It puts me on edge, makes me angry and irate and I have to refuse to let it affect who I am and how I want to be, positive and forward thinking. I can't focus and dwell on things out of my control. The choices of others are just that, their choices. But I CAN choose to protect myself, my health, and in turn the protection and care of my family, by doing what I can to make change or get out of the way.

I sent through my response to the condo management on Friday after making numerous phone calls and speaking with those with more knowledge and leverage to put across my point. I must say that my dealings with my condo manager have turned into something more than just basic repairs. After attending the condo annual meeting on Monday, my self and my neighbour experienced the same feeling from the board (and manager) and it is time to make a change. In our entire complex, the row that we live down is the most neglected. But the attitudes that were shared at the meeting confirmed the reasons why. Their assumption is that the people in that area (with exception to the few owners that live there) don't care to take care of where they live. So they are choosing to do nothing since they assume it's just going to get damaged again. NO GOOD! I won't go into too much detail, but I am choosing to be a voice against that matter, among many others. When I received the phone call from condo management on Wednesday and she shared what she had to say as well as some of her opinions I had to cut her off. She expressed what she called for and that was all I needed to hear. She was proceeding to attack me personally with false information and I do not take that in.

So what did I learn this week?
I need to finish doing my laundry. My dirty laundry was getting to be an issue. It was temporary, but when you are under a microscope and the way you are living is being criticized, you need to be above reproach.
I really don't eat much when I am stressed. I had to use my children asking me for food as a guide to eat. I worked hard all week and made sure to focus of expressing my love and gratitude to my husband as he was stressed by it all as well (on top of everything else).
Do not give your pearls to pigs. Don't waste your energy on giving information that will not be received or taken out of context to be used against you. Need-to-know basis has come to a new level of meaning.
Surround yourself with love and support and give it as you receive it. Although this trial is similar to ones we experienced in the past, this time around we were enveloped with love and support. Protected by a barrier that came so fast and furious to shield us from harm in our time of need, that the situation was reduced to a mere rainstorm in our summer weather. Thank you!
Keep moving forward. Don't be "interrupted" in what you set out to do by unexpected bumps in life. We travel on the same road .....the conditions of the road are never certain and sometimes other drivers do their own thing. That's just a part of driving.....I mean life hehe.
And to close, I love Mary J Blige. As I pushed through the challenges of the week, I listened to "Just fine" over and over again. I even did my intervals dancing to it. I loved singing to it and I am going to leave out with the lyrics to the song. Have a great day and a great week! (the song is also on my page under my music).

Let it go...
Can't let this thing called love get away from you
Feel free right now, go do what you want to do
Can't let nobody take it away, from you, from me, from we
No time for moping around, are you kidding?
And no time for negative vibes, cause I'm winning
It's been a long week, I put in my hardest
Gonna live my life, feels so good to get it right

So I like what I see when I'm looking at me
When I'm walking past the mirror
No stress through the night, at a time in my life
Ain't worried about if you feel it
Got my head on straight, I got my mind right
I aint gonna let you kill it
You see I wouldn't change my life, my life's just...

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I wouldn't change my life, my life's just fine

Feels so good, when you're doing all the things that you want to do
Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new
Keep your head up high
In yourself, believe in you, believe in me
Having a really good time, I'm not complaining
And I'm a still wear a smile if it raining
I got to enjoy myself regardless
I appreciate life, I'm so glad I got mine

So I like what I see when I'm looking at me
When I'm walking past the mirror
Aint worried about you and what you gonna do
I'm a lady so I must stay classy
Got to keep it hot, keep it together
If I want to get better
You see I wouldn't change my life, my life's just...
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I won't change my life, my life's just fine

I aint gon' let nothing get in my way
(I ain't gone let nobody bring me down, no, no, no)
No matter what nobody has to say
(No way, no way, no way)
I ain't gon' let nothing get in my way
No matter what nobody has to say

Feels so good, when you're doing all the things that you want to do
Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new
It's a really good thing to say
That I won't change my life, my life's just fine

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I won't change my life, my life's just fine

So I like what I see when I'm looking at me
When I'm walking past the mirror
No stress through the night, at a time in my life
Ain't worried about if you feel it
Got my head on straight, I got my mind right
I ain't gonna let you kill it
You see I wouldn't change my life, my life's just...

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I wouldn't change my life, my life's just fine

Tags: don't, give, goals, health, learn, life, love, strength, support, up