(skip, skip, skip)..........it's SPRING TIME!
GOOD MORNING!
I opened the door this morning and I heard this nightingale sing so beautifully to me and I thought to myself "I wish I was like Snow White and could sing back to the bird a happy tune."
This past week there were so many things to celebrate. I got to share in the joy of a husband and then his wife being baptized. My boys returned to normality and filled with joy and cuddling and mental stillness. I re-established communication with an old childhood friend (and our kids get along so well). I lost inches and started a new phase in my workouts (WOOHOOO!!....thanks be to God for providing a way) and the boys had a great time at my friends house for a play date (we are going to make it a regular thing now). But also this week has been one of major stress.
Sometimes I live a life of such strong contrasts. I feel like everyday I have to FIGHT for joy and peace and happiness. And believe me, the fight is worth it. It is painful, but it brings you to a point of such growth and accomplishment when you can persevere and overcome whatever obstacle was holding you back or producing negative growth. It is possible to not go forward in life and choose to run in the opposite direction. It is possible to turn away from what you know is right and know is good and turn towards things that will harm you or lead to your own destruction. I have had the misfortune of watching people die from doing such things and I live the lesson learned that I will LIVE for continued GROWTH in my life. I will take what I have seen and what they have experienced and strive for positive growth in me and in the lives around me.
This week, we have had increased fatigue and illness (us as well as my neighbours) from the exposure to toxins (mold in the attic of our condos), I experienced the consequences of the exposure I have had to fragrances, an increasingly busy schedule and dealing with the frustrations, self-attacks and self-sabotage, constant negative speech and complaining of a depressed workaholic. For me, dealing with health issues and negativity are huge. They eat away at the things I work hard for; being healthy and positive. I used to be depressed, but the advantage of it was, I was in LOVE with all the wonderful things around me. Nature! The sun, the trees, the flowers, the moon, the stars, the worms, the ants, the birds and animals, they all gave me such encouragement when I had no one to talk to, and no friends to turn to. I was lonely for a big bulk of my life. I was attacked, neglected, rejected, and treated as an outsider. At the same time, I encouraged, I protected, and fought for the same people who attacked me. Eventually, their hearts softened and they regretted what they had done and have been apologetic in their approach and continue to try and encourage and love me, but the years of pain have left their scar. So regardless if it is other people or one's very self that is attacking, it is still painful.
I am hopeful in the fact that my husband is married to me and through that, I am a friend, and I encourage him, and love him and push him towards his friends and others who want to encourage him and spend time with him and I do not allow him to keep running with negativity. And that he does not fully understand and know what he is doing to himself and when he does figure it out and grow through the experience, I am hopeful that he will choose growth over destruction, but it is still painful to go through. Please, I ask that he will be in your thoughts and prayers at this time and thank you for your support and helping me to not feel alone in my struggles.
I opened the door this morning and I heard this nightingale sing so beautifully to me and I thought to myself "I wish I was like Snow White and could sing back to the bird a happy tune."
This past week there were so many things to celebrate. I got to share in the joy of a husband and then his wife being baptized. My boys returned to normality and filled with joy and cuddling and mental stillness. I re-established communication with an old childhood friend (and our kids get along so well). I lost inches and started a new phase in my workouts (WOOHOOO!!....thanks be to God for providing a way) and the boys had a great time at my friends house for a play date (we are going to make it a regular thing now). But also this week has been one of major stress.
Sometimes I live a life of such strong contrasts. I feel like everyday I have to FIGHT for joy and peace and happiness. And believe me, the fight is worth it. It is painful, but it brings you to a point of such growth and accomplishment when you can persevere and overcome whatever obstacle was holding you back or producing negative growth. It is possible to not go forward in life and choose to run in the opposite direction. It is possible to turn away from what you know is right and know is good and turn towards things that will harm you or lead to your own destruction. I have had the misfortune of watching people die from doing such things and I live the lesson learned that I will LIVE for continued GROWTH in my life. I will take what I have seen and what they have experienced and strive for positive growth in me and in the lives around me.
This week, we have had increased fatigue and illness (us as well as my neighbours) from the exposure to toxins (mold in the attic of our condos), I experienced the consequences of the exposure I have had to fragrances, an increasingly busy schedule and dealing with the frustrations, self-attacks and self-sabotage, constant negative speech and complaining of a depressed workaholic. For me, dealing with health issues and negativity are huge. They eat away at the things I work hard for; being healthy and positive. I used to be depressed, but the advantage of it was, I was in LOVE with all the wonderful things around me. Nature! The sun, the trees, the flowers, the moon, the stars, the worms, the ants, the birds and animals, they all gave me such encouragement when I had no one to talk to, and no friends to turn to. I was lonely for a big bulk of my life. I was attacked, neglected, rejected, and treated as an outsider. At the same time, I encouraged, I protected, and fought for the same people who attacked me. Eventually, their hearts softened and they regretted what they had done and have been apologetic in their approach and continue to try and encourage and love me, but the years of pain have left their scar. So regardless if it is other people or one's very self that is attacking, it is still painful.
I am hopeful in the fact that my husband is married to me and through that, I am a friend, and I encourage him, and love him and push him towards his friends and others who want to encourage him and spend time with him and I do not allow him to keep running with negativity. And that he does not fully understand and know what he is doing to himself and when he does figure it out and grow through the experience, I am hopeful that he will choose growth over destruction, but it is still painful to go through. Please, I ask that he will be in your thoughts and prayers at this time and thank you for your support and helping me to not feel alone in my struggles.
Tags: don't, future, goals, going, health, hope, keep, love, positivity, quit
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